New Years Day

We all survived. We made it to another year. We woke up each day ( despite our best efforts) and had a full years yup. The full 365... Of life's each and every day. And usually doing the same thing each and everyday until New Years comes around and resets the ever ticking clock- back to day one so u can repeat the same 365 days again and say things like " this is my year"... Sounds a lot like when schoolmates would write sweet things in your yearbook because they are going to miss you over the summer. ( side story, was reading mine not too long ago and from one of my best friends it simply said "Kyle- I hope you have a summer." Um, do I have a choice?) 

Omg, and the resolutions! I live for Facebook resolution status! They are so hilarious delusional and even better when they are completely awkward. 

" bye 2013! You were a good year, but this year I'm gonna focus on my waist line, abs, success and stop wearing skid marked Granny Panties on dates to see if the guy really likes me or not!"

That is just uncomfortable and peel back on what you reveal, honey. 

Wait, that was a terrible comparison, I'm off my game today. 

I just compared what reads back to the most depressing view of life ever to a high school year book? 

It's New Year's Day. Of course I'm hanging a bit. But, not too bad. Not too bad. 

I'm gonna go throw up again now. 

Ok, I'm just kidding, I'm not vomitting. 

It's been nice, I haven't vomited in awhile. 

Do you ever sit back and ponder the last time you vomited and why? 

I don't, ever. But i just did. " this is my year"...

So let's see, lots of positive and major things around me lately, including my beautiful elephant N'Dambi... 

It's the little shiny beautiful things in life that make me happy. That make that boring, mundane 365 worth it. For me. Not many people understand this. I am aware that I have a huge gaseous vapor pulsing through my body. Some people call that sadness, loss, grief, and how you choose to deal with it. It's life. Mine happens to be a little different than yours ( and I'm talking ALL of you) I like to think we all are 100% unique! because I've never met anyone even close to being exactly me. They might have similair interests and we can form friendships but why wouldn't we all be 100% unique based on the statistic of me. I took a 1 person ( myself) pole to prove my theory. 

N'Dambi has been my happiness these past couple of days. My strength. And she has a really cute rhinestone in her nose, just like daddy! 

Ok so- things I did in the last couple of days besides write:

Made major life decision involving moving and leaving the island. 

Re-pierced my nose by myself because I'm badass

Almost had a threesome with a straight couple! Yup, a married Husband and Wife tried to get some. 

They almost did. They still might. 

I have very sloppily shoplifted things I do not need just for the thrill of it, and have not gotten caught.

But, because is just put that out there and that's the last thing I need, that ends. 

It was like 4 or maybe 6 major companies that I stole very small things from so I would have some Xmas presents. For myself, don't get greedy on me. I stole them fair and square. I did gift the perfume however. And I'm waiting for that special someone who shall receive the Pout Lip Stain from Vicky Hush-Hush... I also got a bunch of really pale make up from Mac, eye creams from sephora, stuff from Macys (hi N'Dambi) and so much more! 

I had a portable e-hookah from  7-11. It was grape, but lasted 3 days and would've cost me $10!

I don't steal, that was thrill seeking broke on the holidays depression, and it fucking worked. 

Umm... Stopped smoking cigarettes. Kind of on accident. Well, I'm still puffing on the good old e-cig but that's that. If you can't afford to smoke, then um don't. 

I'm still in orientation at the new job ( I know, I'm looking for something else) because of the Holidays, but at least I know there is a paycheck in my future no matter how big. Mama is broke! 

I finally received a dollop of closure with the ex, until next time. 

I got drunk and really angry and told him off, apologized later. 

It pales nothing in comparison to the things he has been saying to me on a daily basis, but mine was all at once but in my defense it was provoked.

I wrote him an I'm leaving the island and I need to know before I buy the ticket if there is any chance for us. 

I poured my heart out. No response. 

Finally, I got a no. 

At least I know not to waste my time anymore. I can't help it, it consumes me sometimes. 

I know, you're all like "sometimes? Have you read your blog? Get the fuck out of here"

Watched an awesome movie called Side Effects about anti-depressants. It's on your Netflix. Watch it.

Re read Midnight In The Garden Of Good And Evil, and watched a bunch of True Blood, trying to catch up I'm mid season 4...

But, having done all that I still feel unfulfilled here. I'm not looking forward to the weather in Chicago, but at least I'll have friends and family ( I do here too, but I'm at a complete crossroads and the clock is ticking) plus, through all this I have a really bad taste in my mouth towards Hawaii. I just need some new adventures and a new neighborhood to live in and I'm all good. Just keep thinking positivity and live your life! So no, this does not mean I am for sure sure leaving the island. 

We shall reconvene in 364...

That, by the way is what today looks like and I'm moving back to what now? I'm referring to the picture below, taken moments ago. You bitches are freezing in the snow, I'm gonna lay out by the pool.

Conundrum... But a happy place one!

Love,

K.J. Dominick's 

I'm gonna go shoot myself in the face to kill this throbbing in my head! 

Or just take an Aleve. That should do it, it fucking better!